Acceptance...a tough call.

Today morning I was talking to a fellow colleague and we were reminiscing about the days we worked together. Children we worked with had all grown up and were scattered all over, some doing very well, some just ok and a few still floundering. And kids who were floundering were sadly of those parents who still after years and years of being with their child refused to acknowledge the "different" needs of their child. Even after 12-13 years they were trying to push a round peg in a square hole. It breaks my heart to encounter such parents who know in their hearts that their child is different but refuse to say it. They refuse to see it. They refuse to hear it. It just makes their journey hundred times more difficult but how do you convince them? All parents when told about their child's special needs go through different phases: shock - denial ("When I was young I did the same."), anger - guilt - blaming ("It's all the teacher’s/school's fault", "If only I hadn't done ...", "Why is God punishing me?"), resignation ("It's God's will"), depression ("I can't go on...") and Acceptance ("Ok, so what can I do to help my child."). Each parent move through the stages at their own pace, but they do. However, there are a few who get stuck in some stage and never get to the last one. For reasons known only to them they have a difficult time getting past a certain stage. There could be factors which are reinforcing their doubts and this continues. Parents go from doctor to doctor, specialist to specialist in the hope that someone will pronounce their child "normal". In this whole exercise it's the child who suffers. This child who could have gotten the remediation and could have become mainstreamed is still at large with the gap widening at an exponential rate.
This is not to make little of the parent's emotions. Being a parent I know that I would be devastated if I were told that my child is not "neurotypical" and I too will go through a whole gamut of feelings. But being the adult in the relationship and being the caregiver who is solely responsible for my child's well being I would try to see the writing on the wall and get going. Like they when "the going gets tough, the tough gets going"...
Time is of essence here...lets use it judiciously.